Hello Spring!

Hallelujah, it has sprung!
Everywhere I look, I get inspired this time of year.  Bright colors, green grass sprouting, shirts on the rack the color of orange sherbet, warm breezes, little buds on trees, sunny evenings, tulips, pastels, peeps and newness!

Spring must be a sister to New Years Day.
It gives you that feeling of a new start....throw out your old ways, bury your bad habits, reinvent....recreate....rejuvenate!

We're taking time to smell the flowers and enjoy this spring with all its perfectness.
This little lady has never experienced a spring before.
We're showing, sharing and experiencing it with her.

We saw "First Day of Spring" on the calendar and decided..... its time!

Time to introduce Maya to something new. 

This little baby is not so little anymore. 

The "Newness" of a new role of being a parent is starting to feel a little more comfortable. 

The shoes are starting to fit a little better.

I've always said, "I am a student of life."

The learning curve on being a parent is high, but I've never felt so much happiness in the process of learning...the experience of it....the good, the challenging, the unknown and the fun.

I couldn't get to the mailbox fast enough tonight.  I had a bracelet made that I knew was arriving.  I felt like I had struck gold as I slipped it on my wrist and immediately, Maya reached out.  I think she knew. 

She knew her mama is in love with loving THIS moment.

This one--right here. 

Right now. 

Whether sunny, raining, a great experience or one of those "learning experiences in life", its about finding the good. 

Finding the joy.  Understanding its part of the journey.

Seeking the love. 

Loving this Moment.

As Dan was holding Maya later, I couldn't help to smile.

She got a new bracelet too.

'love this moment'....oh yes.

Memory Lane

In late November of 1997, my friend Tara called me.  Tara and I worked at the same bank and were planning to go to the annual company holiday party later that evening.

She had big news, though.

After our company holiday party, she had another party for us to go to...a party at "The Red Door".  Sounds like a fancy place, but it was a college house...with a red front door.  I have no idea who lived at the Red Door, but they often had parties and Tara was my direct link to any fun action.  Without Tara in college, I'm pretty sure I would have sat at home, watching reruns of House Hunters or new episodes of 20/20 on Friday and Saturday nights, eating microwave popcorn and Twizzlers.  The Freshman 15 would have been the Freshman 50.

That crisp November night, Tara and I made our way to the bank's holiday party, ate the fancy dinner they served, drank our Mt. Dews (we weren't of age at that party!), stayed for the door prizes and then quickly made eye contact that screamed to each other, "Red Door Time!!"

When we arrived, it was the usual.  Packed with college students.  Hot.  A keg in the corner.  Loud.  So college.  Fun. Fun. Fun.  We settled in, grabbed a cheap plastic cup for a cold beverage, chatted with other fun souls, and started making "rounds".  The rounds where you circle the tiny house to make sure you see everyone at the party.  We hated missing any action. 

One of the "rounds" landed us in meeting a new group of people.  A group of 3 guys that looked pretty fun.  A group that was pretty cute.  The story continues, but the details will be spared....
Little did I know, 15 years later, I call one of those 3 guys my husband, my daughter's dad, my best friend. 

This past weekend, we took Maya to visit the Red Door.

The actual door that was red is gone....but the spirit of the house being a "college house" is still alive and well!

Across the street from the Red Door is Moorhead State's campus...the college campus that Dan and I both earned our degrees....and where our love and memories started.

If felt like Freshman orientation.  Maya learned where we lived, where we ate, where we worked, what classes we went to...what classes we skipped, and even where we shared our first kiss! 

We also celebrated my niece, Jada's, 3rd birthday at Chuck E. Cheese this weekend. 

It was loud, fun and memorable.  A homemade rainbow cake, presents galore, singing, candles, love, pizza, cheers, tickets, hugs, prizes, balloons....pure joy!

Joyful Spirit.

Four months of JOY...

For her...

And for us...

At four months....

She has found these delicious toes. 

She know why I love them.  She loves 'em too.

  

We're lovin' the almost 16 pounds of her.

This week was filled with so many joyful moments.

Lots of smiles.  A few giggles.

Walks outside.  Candlelit baths.

Target adventures. 

Lots of books.  Tons of drool.

Dinner out.  4 month shots. 

A Gopher game for Dan. A night away for me.

The last four months were filled with days....Days of simple moments.

Days that turned into months.  Moments that turned into pure joy.

  

Wonder and Magic

Back in November, her little legs curled up to fit perfectly in the sling of her bathtub. 

Months later, she still sits in the sling of the tub.....its just a little tighter these days.  Her toes no longer rest at the bottom of the sling, but at the bottom of the tub.

One of my favorite times of days is when the lights get dimmed, the candle gets lit (yes, literally every night!), the play button is pushed on the Jack Johnson CD (we'll get use to that i-pod thing soon enough), the fireplace is kindled (aka...the switch is turned on) and the Aveeno Nighttime bath bubbles are put into her tub.

We know we'll have to transition her from taking her baths on the island of our kitchen to the bathroom soon enough. 
For now, it's the perfect place. 

We read different books to her every night...but I've fallen in love with ending with the same book every night....
"On the Night you were Born". 

























One of my favorite lines is the first one, "On the night you were born, you brought wonder and magic to the world."

Wonder and magic...she certainly has.

I also started reading an adult book this week.  I bought it on one of my "Night escapes".  I call the hours between 8:01pm and 10pm the time for the escape.  The grocery shopping, the cleaning, the Target-fun-runs, the dishes, the bookstore runs. 

Chapter 6 of the book is titled, "We all do the same things.  It's how we do them that makes the difference". 
Oh, I feel the inspiration entering my bones.

Its a simple a choice. 
A choice between going through the motions....or making the wonder and magic happen in life.

This week, I'm committing to doing the "same things"....but doing them differently. 

To get my spark started.....

I'll still go to the grocery store....but I'll buy an extra can for the food shelf box that I have NEVER purchased anything for, but yet I walk buy it EVERY time I go. 
I'll still drop Maya off at daycare, but I'm going to bring Maya's daycare provider, Kelly, breakfast one morning this week. 
I'll still hope that Dan is thinking about making dinner before I get home at the end of the night, but one night this week, I'll pick up take-out and surprise him. 

Small things. 
Not going to change the world, but might bring a little more to my world.
A little more wonder. 
A tiny bit more magic.  

Weekends.

Weekends used to be filled with no alarms, shopping for hours and dinner at new restaurants.  I
 loved them, I craved them, I savored them.

Weekends have an alarm now.  A human alarm. 
She tends to think 5:30am is a real nice round number.  I cringe a little when I hear that alert little cry, but my spirit soars when I walk in and our eyes meet. 

Her arms start pumping, her legs start kicking, her smile lights up the room and her little voice squeals with joyful delight. 
She is ready. 
Ready to face the big world and ready to get smothered in kisses.

The Weekend was a good one.
Filled with smiles, joy and fun. 

I love these new weekends.....and crave them....and savor them. 
They're different, but they're also better. 
They're meaningful and I am grateful for the changes they've inspired. 
We're going to focus on enjoying the 'in-between' days until we meet the weekend again.

Tell 'em.

I Love You.

It's so easy to share with a baby how you feel about them. 
They don't judge. 
They don't get uncomfortable when you tell them you love them 12 times in a row.  
You don't have to wonder if they feel the same way. 
You don't care.

You just tell 'em.  You would shout it from the roof-top....heck, you'd shout it from the top of the biggest mountain you could find. 
You'd tell everyone in the world how much you love this little one.

The world is funny that way. 
People get uncomfortable telling others how they feel. 
Sharing their feelings.  "Spilling their guts" without any reservations.  Professing their love, or even their intense gratitude, for another, without concern they may not hear it back is not so comfy.

I have work to do in this department too.
I do know, though, that we all could open our hearts up a little more.  Share a little more.  Be ok with making another feel a little uncomfortable, when your intent is to share a little of your heart.

Last week, when Dan and I were at Mayo meeting with Dan's Neurosurgeon, I wanted to share my heart with him.  He isn't exactly Mr. Touchy-feely.  In fact, many people told us not to expect eye contact, much less a smile. 
He was described as "arrogant, egotistical and no-bedside-manner". 
His reputation may have been accurate......but, I still felt love for this man.  We weren't looking a friend...we were looking for the most skilled neurosurgeon that we could find in this big world. 
He lived up to this reputation as well.

I decided to write a him a letter. 

I told him he may not remember every patient he meets.

I told him he may not remember us.

I also told him we will always remember him.

We met him the day before we welcomed our first daughter to this world. 

We met him when we were nervous, uncertain and overwhelmed.

We met him when we wondered what the future would hold.

He made an impact to Dan's life....to our life.

I wanted him to know how I felt from my heart.  He may have been uncomfortable by the letter....after all, I'm not exactly a brief writer and I couldn't just state, "Thank you--nice job".  I had to bring my whole heart to my message. 

I'm grateful I did.

Babies are ready to receive.
Be ready to receive.  Ready to give. 
Ready to live without a regret that you didn't share.

Be willing to be a little uncomfortable.
You'll be grateful that you did.

Working Mom.

I've been a daughter and a sister since the day I was born.
A friend since I met my first best friend, Tiffany, when I was just 5 years old.
Been an employee since I filled out my first W2 when I started at "Sunrise Sunset Daycare" at the ripe old age of 14.
I've been a happily married wife since 2002.
Have loved being an aunt since Brooke came into this world just 5 years ago.

Been honored to be a Mom since November 2, 2011.

I've realized you rarely give up something to become something else. 
If you want a full life, you add to it.....with another role, another opportunity to make your life richer, fuller, more full of life.

Your "Life Resume" expands. 

Your experience grows....and you grow.
You don't stop being a daughter in order to be a friend.  You add this new role to become a better, stronger, more engaging human being.

This week, I added "Working Mom" to my experience.

Everyone said I'd cry on that first day. 

Many friends encouraged me to have Dan do "drop-off" on her first day of daycare.  (His response, "Nice.  So, you're going to make me do it by myself instead?  How about if we do it together?".....someone has become skilled at compromising.)

I was determined not to cry.

But, I couldn't even manage to get of the garage. 
No, not because I was crying.

Because I ran into the garage.

I couldn't even get out of the garage before my first official day as a "Working Mom" started.
I really did think I was going to cry as I looked at the dented garage door that Dan had to manually shut and as I took a peek at my bruised rooftop of my car. 
All I could think to do was laugh. 

I laughed....hard. 
And then I went to Caribou Coffee. 
Nothing cures a little jolt to your day like a skinny latte.

Life is all about moving, evolving, learning and growing and I was up to bat with a new role, a new perspective, a new life experience. 

I'm more than just a mom or an employee or a daughter or a sister.  I can't give up one role in order to start another.  Life is about finding ways to give, learn, share and grow with all of those roles intertwined together, in a beautiful, crazy, fun and oftentimes funny web. 

One week down.
I'll get better at this working-mom stuff.  I'll learn, grow and change.  In the meantime, we're grateful for my Dad's skill.  Thanks, Dad, for lending us your handyman work this weekend. 
Our garage is grateful too.