You are my Sunshine

I've always loved that song.  I've never thought about the meaning of the little tune.

"You are my Sunshine.  My only Sunshine."

"You make me happy....when skies are grey."





"You'll never know, dear, how much I love you."



"Please don't take my sunshine away."

This girl is going to know this song.

I sing it every morning when we get in the car together. 

As we're backing out of the driveway, I start singing.  Sometimes, I sing it four times before we arrive at her daycare.  Sometimes, I mix it up and sing it loud...sometimes quietly...sometimes, I end up humming the tune to her long after the words have been sung. 

Regardless, she hears it and she knows.

She knows....she's added sunshine to our world.

Smiles, serious looks and little laughs. 

She is our sunshine!

16 Eggs

Last year, we broke the news.
We told Brooke first.
She was going to be a big cousin.
She agreed to put the "I'm going to be a big cousin" t-shirt on after I told her and walk out of the bedroom to see what her Mom would say.  I prepped her.  I told her that I think her Mom might be a shocked.  She innocently asked, "What does shocked mean?"

As Brooke walked out of the bedroom proudly wearing her new shirt, Heather glanced at the shirt and moments later, Brooke learned what the word 'shocked' means.  Crazy, excited, happy, joyful squeals!

Easter....One Year Later.

A year later, I'm determined. 
Determined more than ever to make holidays a much anticipated experience.  I want Maya to  be so, so, so excited about them that she'll ask to make a paper-chain-countdown 6 months before the holiday rolls around.  
I want to celebrate them, cherish them, capture them and make memories that we look back on with joy, laughter and fun.  I have a feeling I'll be buying stock in the construction paper company for those paper chains.

I want to make each day special and make it feel like a holiday everyday, so when you add a true holiday to the mix, it feels like a double dose of accountability to make sure this happens. 
I've always loved holidays and loved trying to make them special, but it was more because I was trying a new recipe, buying a new outfit to kickoff spring or the holidays, or finding a gift that I thought someone would enjoy.
Creating memorable moments was for us.  It was fun, it was looked forward to and there certainly was always joy, fun and meaning. 
A new memory making reason has rolled in now....one that turned 5 months old just before the holiday.

The Eve before Easter, we had a slumber party with the 3 cousins, complete with homemade pizzas, chocolate chip cookies and a few rounds of the Bunny Hokey Pokey. 

Learning to play checkers.....

One day, these three will be in a big bathtub together.  For now, its a little more of a spectator sport.

We were so excited and grateful to have both Dan and my family at our home for Easter.  The day started off with sunshine streaming in the windows, 3 excited little girls joining us in our bed, and much anticipation of preparing the Easter Brunch. 
Pure Joy in my book.

Brunch was set for noon. 
Everyone was coming over around 11am. 
I was going to be prepared, going to have my hair curled, my Easter outfit on, the candles lit, the homemade cinnamon rolls baking, the appetizer coming out of the oven 'just as our guests arrived' and the table 'just perfect'.
But, a moment that was more important, more meaningful, more memorable for the future changed this.
16 eggs needed to be cracked.

These two little hands were in charge of cracking 16 eggs. 
One at a time.
Sometimes, they would just crack a little and we would watch the white of the egg slooooooooowly escape.  Then the yolk would even more sloooooooooooowly come trickling out.
I knew it was a moment.  To breathe.  To share.  To be just as excited as she was about helping make Easter Brunch.  To celebrate that she cracked 16 eggs.
At 11:37 am, our guests had all arrived and I was kneading cinnamon rolls with my partner in crime.

I was still in my pajamas.
I hadn't brushed my teeth and there were definitely not curls in my hair.
I could feel my anticipation....a little bit of dread creeping in....a little frustration taking over.....a bit of regret that I didn't prepare more ahead of time....a moment when I "wished I had quickly done it all myself". 
I learned something.
Nobody will remember whether we ate at noon or at 1pm.  Nobody will remember whether I had a sweatshirt on when they arrived or my Easter best.  Nobody will wonder what I was doing rather than making sure the asparagus tart was done to be served in sync with the Spring Mimosas. 
But She'll remember.  She proudly shared with everyone at the Easter table, "I cracked Sixxxxteeeeeeeen Eggs!!" 
A moment.
A memory.

(Note my Dad and Maya's faces.....must be the look of patience of watching 16 eggs being cracked!)

I didn't realize the learning until later.  Life isn't about hurrying through to get things done.  Its about loving the moment, loving THIS moment. 

There were 20 tulips on the table and 11 of the most important people in our lives gathered around that table.
We laughed, we clinked glasses, we prayed and thanked God for sunshine and rainbows and for the great fortune of having us all together.
The day ended with a hunt.  Looking and seeking and cheering when we found eggs.

I found myself looking and seeking the perfect Easter Brunch, but truly feeling grateful about finding a different outcome and yet feeling that outcome was a better one.

Sometimes, what is not perfect is perfectly perfect.

You got the whole world in your hands

I am amazed.
I never knew how much a parent would want and dream for their child.
I want her to know....The world is waiting for her.

When my Mom and Dad use to say, "You can do anything you want to!", I didn't know how much they really, really believed it.  I may have had doubts or insecurities of whether I was good enough, strong enough, smart enough, creative enough or anything enough. 
They never doubted.
I get it now.

I want her to know.
She's good enough.  Smart enough. Strong enough.  Creative enough.  You are enough.
The world is yours to explore, to challenge, to create, to love.
The "doubters" on the outside, or the doubts inside of you one day.....give 'em a run for their money. 
This great big world is ready for you, Maya Leigh, and what a gift it is to travel with you on this journey of life! 



"Don't ask yourself what the world needs. Ask yourself what makes you come alive and then go do that. Because what the world needs is people who have come alive."

Hello Spring!

Hallelujah, it has sprung!
Everywhere I look, I get inspired this time of year.  Bright colors, green grass sprouting, shirts on the rack the color of orange sherbet, warm breezes, little buds on trees, sunny evenings, tulips, pastels, peeps and newness!

Spring must be a sister to New Years Day.
It gives you that feeling of a new start....throw out your old ways, bury your bad habits, reinvent....recreate....rejuvenate!

We're taking time to smell the flowers and enjoy this spring with all its perfectness.
This little lady has never experienced a spring before.
We're showing, sharing and experiencing it with her.

We saw "First Day of Spring" on the calendar and decided..... its time!

Time to introduce Maya to something new. 

This little baby is not so little anymore. 

The "Newness" of a new role of being a parent is starting to feel a little more comfortable. 

The shoes are starting to fit a little better.

I've always said, "I am a student of life."

The learning curve on being a parent is high, but I've never felt so much happiness in the process of learning...the experience of it....the good, the challenging, the unknown and the fun.

I couldn't get to the mailbox fast enough tonight.  I had a bracelet made that I knew was arriving.  I felt like I had struck gold as I slipped it on my wrist and immediately, Maya reached out.  I think she knew. 

She knew her mama is in love with loving THIS moment.

This one--right here. 

Right now. 

Whether sunny, raining, a great experience or one of those "learning experiences in life", its about finding the good. 

Finding the joy.  Understanding its part of the journey.

Seeking the love. 

Loving this Moment.

As Dan was holding Maya later, I couldn't help to smile.

She got a new bracelet too.

'love this moment'....oh yes.

Memory Lane

In late November of 1997, my friend Tara called me.  Tara and I worked at the same bank and were planning to go to the annual company holiday party later that evening.

She had big news, though.

After our company holiday party, she had another party for us to go to...a party at "The Red Door".  Sounds like a fancy place, but it was a college house...with a red front door.  I have no idea who lived at the Red Door, but they often had parties and Tara was my direct link to any fun action.  Without Tara in college, I'm pretty sure I would have sat at home, watching reruns of House Hunters or new episodes of 20/20 on Friday and Saturday nights, eating microwave popcorn and Twizzlers.  The Freshman 15 would have been the Freshman 50.

That crisp November night, Tara and I made our way to the bank's holiday party, ate the fancy dinner they served, drank our Mt. Dews (we weren't of age at that party!), stayed for the door prizes and then quickly made eye contact that screamed to each other, "Red Door Time!!"

When we arrived, it was the usual.  Packed with college students.  Hot.  A keg in the corner.  Loud.  So college.  Fun. Fun. Fun.  We settled in, grabbed a cheap plastic cup for a cold beverage, chatted with other fun souls, and started making "rounds".  The rounds where you circle the tiny house to make sure you see everyone at the party.  We hated missing any action. 

One of the "rounds" landed us in meeting a new group of people.  A group of 3 guys that looked pretty fun.  A group that was pretty cute.  The story continues, but the details will be spared....
Little did I know, 15 years later, I call one of those 3 guys my husband, my daughter's dad, my best friend. 

This past weekend, we took Maya to visit the Red Door.

The actual door that was red is gone....but the spirit of the house being a "college house" is still alive and well!

Across the street from the Red Door is Moorhead State's campus...the college campus that Dan and I both earned our degrees....and where our love and memories started.

If felt like Freshman orientation.  Maya learned where we lived, where we ate, where we worked, what classes we went to...what classes we skipped, and even where we shared our first kiss! 

We also celebrated my niece, Jada's, 3rd birthday at Chuck E. Cheese this weekend. 

It was loud, fun and memorable.  A homemade rainbow cake, presents galore, singing, candles, love, pizza, cheers, tickets, hugs, prizes, balloons....pure joy!

Joyful Spirit.

Four months of JOY...

For her...

And for us...

At four months....

She has found these delicious toes. 

She know why I love them.  She loves 'em too.

  

We're lovin' the almost 16 pounds of her.

This week was filled with so many joyful moments.

Lots of smiles.  A few giggles.

Walks outside.  Candlelit baths.

Target adventures. 

Lots of books.  Tons of drool.

Dinner out.  4 month shots. 

A Gopher game for Dan. A night away for me.

The last four months were filled with days....Days of simple moments.

Days that turned into months.  Moments that turned into pure joy.

  

Wonder and Magic

Back in November, her little legs curled up to fit perfectly in the sling of her bathtub. 

Months later, she still sits in the sling of the tub.....its just a little tighter these days.  Her toes no longer rest at the bottom of the sling, but at the bottom of the tub.

One of my favorite times of days is when the lights get dimmed, the candle gets lit (yes, literally every night!), the play button is pushed on the Jack Johnson CD (we'll get use to that i-pod thing soon enough), the fireplace is kindled (aka...the switch is turned on) and the Aveeno Nighttime bath bubbles are put into her tub.

We know we'll have to transition her from taking her baths on the island of our kitchen to the bathroom soon enough. 
For now, it's the perfect place. 

We read different books to her every night...but I've fallen in love with ending with the same book every night....
"On the Night you were Born". 

























One of my favorite lines is the first one, "On the night you were born, you brought wonder and magic to the world."

Wonder and magic...she certainly has.

I also started reading an adult book this week.  I bought it on one of my "Night escapes".  I call the hours between 8:01pm and 10pm the time for the escape.  The grocery shopping, the cleaning, the Target-fun-runs, the dishes, the bookstore runs. 

Chapter 6 of the book is titled, "We all do the same things.  It's how we do them that makes the difference". 
Oh, I feel the inspiration entering my bones.

Its a simple a choice. 
A choice between going through the motions....or making the wonder and magic happen in life.

This week, I'm committing to doing the "same things"....but doing them differently. 

To get my spark started.....

I'll still go to the grocery store....but I'll buy an extra can for the food shelf box that I have NEVER purchased anything for, but yet I walk buy it EVERY time I go. 
I'll still drop Maya off at daycare, but I'm going to bring Maya's daycare provider, Kelly, breakfast one morning this week. 
I'll still hope that Dan is thinking about making dinner before I get home at the end of the night, but one night this week, I'll pick up take-out and surprise him. 

Small things. 
Not going to change the world, but might bring a little more to my world.
A little more wonder. 
A tiny bit more magic.